The dialogue that had to die.

[trinityofone]

Apparently there were things besides chocolate and sex that were capable of rendering Rodney incoherent. However, John had really had his heart set on the latter. He tried a different tack. “I’ve just had an emotionally traumatizing experience,” he said. "Please heal me with your penis."

*mourns*

Comments

[claire.livejournal.com]

Oh noes! I'd love to hear more about Rodney's magic healing penis. *encourages you*

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

I was about to say that I'll save it for a crackfic someday. Then I realized that I have actually already written a story about John's magic healing penis. *headdesk*

Um...maybe a companion piece?

[kageygirl.livejournal.com]

Ah, sweet crack!dialogue, we hardly knew ye.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

It will live again, I'm sure. Just...not in a story that's supposed to be serious. Everything turns to crack, I tell you!

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

The healing penii of Rodney. But it only works when applied to Shep - so, go forth and write crack.
LOL!

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

The crack writes itself. The crack invades other, "serious" work. Watch: next a line about Rodney's healing penis is going to sneak into one of my history papers.

Then in 1846, the potato blight struck. Fortunately, Rodney really liked potatoes, so he used the healing power of his penis to make the blight go away. Everyone lived happily ever after and ate lots of potatoes. The end.

A+.

[sonofzeal.livejournal.com]

Straight to the point? Or not, I suppose.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Was that a pun? Tsk.

amazed on behalf of all men

[lordelessar.livejournal.com]

We can heal the sick with our penises? I had no idea they had healing power. How does this work? Should I proceed to a hospital immediately to use my penis to heal the sick? Is this like some xxx Jesus thing? There better not be any lepers involved.

Re: amazed on behalf of all men

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

*scoff* Don't be silly: penises can't heal the sick. Where did you dig up such a ridiculous idea?

No. Penises heal the soul.

Re: amazed on behalf of all men

[lordelessar.livejournal.com]

That's even better. I'm totally telling the next woman I'm hot for that I can heal her soul.

Then I'll tell her how.

Then she'll slap/mace/knee me in the groin.

[violin-road.livejournal.com]

OH BUT THAT'S A WONDERFUL LINE

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

But John isn't Anya!

Hm...yet. *eg*

[some-stars.livejournal.com]

--have you read the Rodney/Anya fic? Because there is one. And it's kind of awesome. I just felt I should mention it, much as a Jehovah's Witness mentions the Lord.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

I have! Because lo, I asked (http://www.livejournal.com/users/trinityofone/24539.html), and praise be, received. Or something.

Still waiting on the John/Rodney/Anya, however... *eg*

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

You should check it out over here. There's a very nice view.

[kalikahuntress.livejournal.com]

WEll, if anything is going to make Rodney speechless this would, I know it worked for me. Please continue with this someday:)

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Don't worry, I love to self-recycle: I'm sure I'll sneak the line into something else one day. Just not something that's supposed to be serious! Which this, ostensibly, is. Or so I tell myself. ;-)

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

The truly frightening thing? I have no idea whether you mean because:

1) I wrote the line in the first place;
or 2) I took it out.

My brain = warped for LIFE!

[leech.livejournal.com]

It's a sign of courage and maturity that you can cut such excellent dialogue.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

And as we all know, I am nothing if not courageous and mature. ;-)

[dizzyditz.livejournal.com]

I laughed so much when I saw that. I think that we should revive this dialogue - Scharffen Berger to the first person to accept the challenge to end every conversation with a man in a 24-hour period with "Please heal me with your penis." Alternatively, they could say "Take, suck. This is my penis, given for you. Whenever you sucketh a penis, do this in remembrance of me. The penis of John, the bread of heaven. The penis of John, given for you, the cum of salvation."

[lordelessar.livejournal.com]

that's funny, yet so unbelievably wrong...

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Damn. I have got to find a way to work that into a story. ;-)

[virulain.livejournal.com]

Delurking...

Military girls and boys are much like high school boys and girls; amazingly uncouth. It could be a kind of catchphrase!