For want of a tooth...

[trinityofone]

Thank you, everyone, for all the thoughtful advice you gave me yesterday. It was really appreciated, and empowering, and I was starting to feel brave and ready to do something.

Then I went to my second dentist appointment this morning.

The two cavities are worse than they thought. At the very least, I need root canals; at worst, the teeth are going to have to be replaced. Months of work are going to be involved, and thousands of dollars.

So...that's it. I can't quit. Because of my fucking teeth, I have to stay at this job that I hate.

I just...y'know, if this were a novel, this would be the kind of plot twist that would really piss me off. You can change your life but what's stopping you is DENTISTRY? What bullshit is this?

Anyway. I'm back at the office now with temporary fillings, puffy chipmunk cheeks, and a head woozy from Novocain, which is also probably the only thing that's keeping me from smashing stuff. I know that this is not a tragedy; this is an inconvenience, an annoyance. I'm not actually ill, so it could be a lot worse; with my insurance and those savings I was talking about, I will even be able to afford this (I think), although all that fallback money is going to be gone. It could be so much worse.

But I'm furious at myself, and I guess at the world? At TPTB? Fate? Way to give me a big old FU, guys; I think I got the message.

So, I guess it's back to work.

Sigh.

Comments

[toft-froggy.livejournal.com]

Ouch... but then, this could be the point at which it all turns around and suddenly all your co-workers grow wings and become incredibly nice, and your job becomes fulfilling and interesting and you meet David Hewlett in the Starbucks around the corner and next thing you know you're up for industry awards and you own the entire company, and then this will just be a punchline for your small, starry-eyed relatives and wet-behind-the-ears recruits where you say, "But there was a time when I nearly quit that job, and do you know the only reason I stayed?"
"No, mummy/auntie/grandma/Mistress Trin!"
"Because of my teeth."
And then everyone will laugh heartily as it goes soft-focus and fades to black. So, here's hoping. If not, well, at least the extra time will look better on your CV. And you'll have good teeth. *sends supportive waves*