Giant cartoon asses & existential dilemmas

[trinityofone]

I just received a press release for a show about a giant cartoon ass that fights crime. A GIANT CARTOON ASS THAT FIGHTS CRIME. *cries*

This...may be only tangentially related to giant cartoon asses, but god, I want to change what I'm doing, change my life so badly. This feels like such a dead end and it's so depressing. I start thinking crazy thoughts like, "I could join the army!" "I could become a cop!" "I could become a stewardess flight attendant!" Because that at least would be different. But I'd probably be miserable doing those things, too.

I feel like I need to do something bold, take some sort of leap of faith, but not only am I a coward, I don't even know what kind of leap to take. What the hell should I do with myself? How come I don't even really know what I want anymore?

I was at a party the other night and one of my parents' friends, who's an entertainment journalist and who I worked as a PA for one summer during college, was there. It was the first time I'd seen her since I graduated. She said, "So, you're working at an entertainment magazine now? You went to Berkeley for that?" She was "kidding," but...Jesus Christ, why am I doing this? What the hell am I doing with my life?

How do I change?

Comments

[boochicken.livejournal.com]

Speaking as someone who just accepted her fourth job, five years out of college -- yeah, your first job is definitely just a starting point. I know exactly one person who's kept the same job since graduation, and he doesn't like it much. The rest of us are working on two-page resumes.

Personally, I look at every job I take as a step towards what I really want to do (health policy research) -- or something to add to the list of "things I never want to do again" (administrative busywork, public relations). While I wouldn't recommend bailing on your current job without a back-up plan -- I've never been so terrified as when I was unemployed with no savings, even if it only lasted a week -- there are plenty of things you can do short-term, without feeling pressured to find Your True Calling. A friend temped, I taught test-prep classes, another friend worked in a bookstore. I remain firmly convinced that your 20s are the decade that you spend trying different things and figuring out what you really want.