Rite of Passage

[trinityofone]

There comes a time in every young fangirl's life when, should she still reside amongst the chalk-dust lecture halls and book-dust libraries of academia, she must pick up the mantle and write an academic paper about slash. And for me, brothers and sisters (mostly sisters), that time has come.

Basically what happened was this: my popular literature class had a guest lecturer, Prof. McCarthy. She was giving a talk on Poppy Z. Brite's Exquisite Corpse (which, embarrassingly, I still have not been able to find), and in doing so, she talked about serial killers in both history and literature, and provided us with some great quotes. (One of my favorites, Paul Anthony Woods on Norman Bates: "He registers in our hearts as one of the most loveable sickos of pop culture.") Then she showed us selected postings from the Yahoo!Group JeffreyDahmerClub. If you click on the link, which I do NOT recommend, you'll see some of what she showed us: people (mostly women) talking about how much they love Jeffrey Dahmer, how they feel he was just misunderstood, how hot he is--all very serious and earnest. I was, needless to say, disturbed by this. Especially because one of the first thoughts that entered my mind was: "Jesus, these people must've been on Yahoo!Groups talking about their love for a serial killer at the exact same time I, fresh-faced and 17, was there posting about my love for Spike."

...At which point I would like to take a time out and say: Fuck you, David Fury.

But ANYWAY...just then Prof. McCarthy said something about how both serial killers and their fans exhibit an "obsessive and insatiable" need for more, more, more. And then she brought up slash.

Slash readers and writers--the term was of course defined for the giggling audience, with the inevitable Kirk/Spock example and an increase in giggling--exhibit, said McCarthy, the same need for more of their chosen type of media: more story, more sexual tension, more sex. Brite, not a slash fan, has bemoaned the fact that while "real" writers will work hard to "create real, complex, multidimensional characters with lives that need no 'improvement' by the peanut gallery, all some readers really want is for [the characters] to fall into a huge rutting jizz-drenched scrum" (Fan Nine from Outer Space). Prof. McCarthy didn't specifically disagree with Brite; mostly she just drew the obvious connections between sex and violence, making, IMO, rather too big a deal about the possible violent connotations of the word "slash." I really wasn't quite sure what she was trying to say, actually; but more than that, I was disturbed that my mind had made the leap from Jeffrey Dahmer fandom to our fandom first, and without being prompted.

After the lecture, there was a question and answer period. I debated whether I should say anything--I didn't want to "out" myself to a room full of strangers, and I wasn't sure how to neutrally phrase a question, or even what I wanted to ask. Finally, I raised my hand and mumbled something about how, while I definitely saw the connection between obsessive-compulsive, insatiable behaviour and slash fandom, didn't Prof. McCarthy think it might have less to do with violence, and more to do with (here I stumbled, wanting to say--I think--love) romance novels? You know, the type little old ladies check out from the library, the type with Fabio on the cover? Prof. McCarthy conceded that this might be so. Class dismissed.

I left unsatisfied. I thought about just going home and writing a bitchy, dismissive post about how we are NOT like that. Yet I was still bothered by the fact that my brain had made the connection first. And what are we, if not obsessive and insatiable? What does that make us--serial readers? Serial writers? Why do we do what we do?

So I went to Dr. Jones' office hours and outed myself as a slasher.

The meeting began less than promisingly, as he greeted me by saying, "Aren't you the student that asked the question about Fabio?" I admitted that I was, and that yes, I am from Berkeley, and that yes (feeling quite the stereotype), I would like to talk more about the gay porn, please.

Dr. Jones said he was "fascinated by this phenomenon known as 'slash.'" I said I was quite an expert, but that the lecture that morning had made me think about why we did it--why I did it. One of our class' essay titles is "Write an essay on why you think formulaic writing is so popular"--could I, I inquired, write an essay about slash?

His response was enthusiastic. Very enthusiastic. Did I mention that I rather adore him? I do, I do.

Anyway, he introduced me to Prof. Silver, whom he called "the university's resident slash expert." Unfortunately, this is not an actual tenured position--too bad, 'cause nice as Prof. Silver was, I could totally have beaten her out for it. She really didn't know much about internet fandom at all, but she gave me a great book--Constance Penley's NASA/TREK, which I highly recommend, despite the fact that it's old and thus deals mostly with 'zines--and even better, a lot of encouragement. In return, I gave her links to some classic fandom stuff--she'd never heard of the Very Secret Diaries! *gasp*--and, when pressed, some of my own stories. (Yikes!) When I come out, I come out hard--bringing the clothes, the hangers, and the dust bunnies with me.

So now--

The short version: I now have just over a weak to write a paper about Why We Slash. I think I can pull together the more academic, sociological sources, but for the rest, I need your help. I want this paper to be different from other writings about slash and fandom: I'm not going to distance myself; rather, I'm going to get permission to write in the first person and include myself in the analysis. I don't want to be yet another judgmental outsider looking in (or down) on "this phenomenon known as slash"; I'm a part of it, I'm not going to deny it, and that gives me a unique perspective.

But I need other people's perspectives--other people's insights--too. So, fellow fandom folks: if you could take the time to answer the following questions, I would be deeply appreciative.

1. What do you get out of a) fanfiction in general and/or genfic; b) romantic, 'shipper fic, regardless of the genders and sexualities of the participants; and c) slash fic, especially m/m slash?

2. How does what you derive from all of these things differ a) from each other; b) from the source material; and c) from real life?

3. If you're a writer as well as a reader, do you derive a different sort of experience from writing than from reading? How do the two compare? (If you're a vidder or artist, please feel free to talk about that, too.)

4. What were your primary reasons for entering fandom--specifically slash fandom? What are your reasons for staying?

5. Why do you think slash fandom and slash fiction are the phenomena that they are?

If you want to provide info about age, gender, sexual preference, when you entered fandom or how long you've been in it, it would be interesting and useful, but obviously, I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. With that in mind, anyone who'd prefer to take this out of a public forum can also e-mail me at kaufmaa@tcd.ie . You can also comment anonymously, though I'd appreciate it if you could provide me with some sort of alias in case I choose to quote you.

With that in mind: unless you tell me otherwise, any quotes I pull will be attributed to your LJ username (minus the LJ distinction, of course.) So if I were quoting myself, I might say: "'I'm in it for the porn, baby!' said one writer, trinityofone. 'Porn, porn, porn--that's what the internet is for!'"* If you'd prefer to be quoted under a different name, just tell me what it is. But don't get too panicky: this paper will most likely be seen by no one other than Dr. Jones, Prof. McCarthy, Prof. Silver, and myself. And we're all very discreet. ;-)

Finally, PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD. Which is to say: the red light is on, I have multiple varieties of condoms (some are flavored!), but right now I'm all by my lonesome, so I need you to pimp, pimp, pimp. Also, if anyone knows of any communities where I might be able to rustle up some participants, that'd be fab.

So in conclusion: let me know if you have any questions, and thanks in advance!

*Actually, I read slash for the articles. 'The' is a good one; so's 'a.' ...And after that display of dorkery, we're all going to pretend this footnote doesn't exist.

Comments

[cimness.livejournal.com]

23, female, bisexual in committed lesbian relationship (i met my partner, a slash writer, through fandom); in slash fandom since january 2001, or about five years. i prefer to be quoted as "cimorene" rather than "cimorene111".

1. What do you get out of a) fanfiction in general and/or genfic; b) romantic, 'shipper fic, regardless of the genders and sexualities of the participants; and c) slash fic, especially m/m slash?

a) for me fanfiction in general is about improving my experience of the source material--whether by simply providing more of it when there wasn't enough (as, for example, the genfic "virtual seasons" of popular tv shows), by dealing with the same stuff only with better writing, or by explaining away logical inconsistencies in canon. here i would like to refer you to mirabile_dictu's essay, "why read? why write?" (http://www.livejournal.com/users/mirabile_dictu/39313.html?#cutid1) allow me to quote her directly a bit:

And for a long time I would have told you that I read (and wrote!) RPS because I wanted more of them. [...]

Having seen Serenity, though, I realize that's not entirely true. Yes, I wanted more LOTR, but what I really wanted was better. I realize that, at heart, I'm a tinhat and a tinkilt and a tin-everything. I read and write LOTR RPS because those silly men didn't pair up in real life.

b) the quote above is a nice segue/answer to the second item too. people want to see romantic resolutions they don't get in canon--whether that romance is actually canonical in some way or completely imaginary.

c) slash fic is much like het shipper fic in that respect--they can both deliver romance, smut, etc. what does slash offer that het doesn't, in my view? it: (1) allows and indeed forces you to indentify with a male protagonist. (2) is all about gayness (and if you're queer yourself, you may just enjoy hanging out with queer things and queer people--having your existence and your group membership externally affirmed, as it were)(of course many slashers are straight women, so that doesn't apply to them, but i think the percentage of bis seems to be on the rise). (3) is one of the few remaining reliable and efficient ways to introduce a big barrier of taboo and element of the forbidden into a romance.

those are the inherent properties of any m/m.

i want to also speak more concretely. my mother's an addict of paperback romance novels, harlequins (not the kind with fabio on the cover, but the contemporaries and regencies), and i was to an extent raised on those. i'm a romance addict, and in my opinion romance, sensuality and erotica have reached a higher evolution in [the good parts of] slash than they have in any mainstream literature. i know i'm not alone here; i've discussed it before with makesmewannadie, for example. the slash community has been a fertile environment for research and development in the field of romance for decades now, and that has paid off. once you've become accustomed to the quality of witty, well-written, subtle and sophisticated romance and erotica that slash has to offer, you will be spoiled for harlequins, and for commercially published erotica too--both of which are on a level, quality-wise, with mediocre to truly bad slash. (of course there is still loads of bad slash that's worse than anything ever published, because internet publication is free; and the bad probably vastly outnumbers the good.)

continued... i apologise for the length, but i figure you can skim and cut it all if you want, so.

[cimness.livejournal.com]

2. How does what you derive from all of these things differ a) from each other; b) from the source material; and c) from real life?

a) fic that isn't romantically focused is vastly different from fic that is. all the genres of literature exist in fanfiction too, and what you get from a romance is very different from what you get from a mystery-adventure or a comedy.

b) sometimes you get a lot of the same things from fiction as from source material. some fan writers are inspired by and devoted to canon, trying to reproduce the tone and mood and overall feel, the genre, the characterisation, the theme--even within the context of slash or shipper fic, although obviously in those two cases the canon can be slightly modified. then there are writers who aren't overly concerned with their source material at all, or who even dislike it and prefer to write according to fanon. obviously they produce very different kinds of stories, and it's possible to enjoy both, but in different ways. if you like a show and a story does an excellent job of reproducing its qualities, you will probably like the story. for fanon-based stories the pull would be something different: perhaps you like one element of the show or one idea but don't like it so much as a whole, and a fanon-based story takes the parts you like and replaces the parts you dislike with something more congenial.

c) certainly the average life doesn't include nearly as much smut and romance as slash fandom does. neither do most of the other things you could be reading as an escape.

3. If you're a writer as well as a reader, do you derive a different sort of experience from writing than from reading? How do the two compare? (If you're a vidder or artist, please feel free to talk about that, too.)

for me, the process of writing a piece of fanfiction revolves around two things: canon, and me. there's canon, which i constantly refer to and think about, and then there's the stuff i'm making up--according to an inner plan, a personal wish of my own, but which i'm constantly trying to merge seamlessly with canon. writing a slash romance is about bridging the gap between where the characters are in canon (usually not even apparently gay, sometimes apparently straight; sometimes not even sharing a very close relationship with each other), and where you want to put them at the end of the story (usually in a sexual or romantic relationship of some kind). you can't just fill that gap in with whatever you want; it's about making your filler blend seamlessly across, like a gradient. in that way, your relationship with canon is very... involved, possibly dynamic and very messy, while you're working.

when i'm reading fic, on the other hand, there's the story i'm reading, there's the canon i'm comparing it to, there's me, and there's the fandom as a whole, the body of all the other literature i've read about that show, or that pairing; or all the other stories i've read with that plot, regardless of fandom. i compare the story to canon, to my own personal preferences for slash, to all the other stories that i've read.

so in a way, i'd say reading takes my thoughts further away from canon. of course, there are other ways they're different--reading is easier, more passive (though not completely passive). it rarely gives you the same high of accomplishment that writing can, but on the other hand, if you've ever felt the horrible lack of a story and eventually had to write it for yourself, you know that that is never a complete substitute to getting to read it written by someone else.

4. What were your primary reasons for entering fandom--specifically slash fandom? What are your reasons for staying?

when i first stumbled into slash, with just one erotic forbidden gay romance story, i found it incredibly compelling. i read it over and over again, but i had no idea why i was so compelled. that feeling and that curiosity led me to seek out other slash to read, and as i got more used to it the initial shock wore off, but i still find it exciting in a way. (which segues nicely to #5.)

the end

[cimness.livejournal.com]

5. Why do you think slash fandom and slash fiction are the phenomena that they are?

that really seems to be the big question for decades now. i'm still curious about it; i still think about it a lot of the time. but right now, i would say that in my opinion the factors which draw and keep the greatest numbers of people are: 1) the forbidden, taboo aspect i mentioned in 1.c(3). i know i've heard resonant8 talk about this issue very interestingly in the past, but i don't have any links on me. 2) the possibility of writing romance/sex without gender roles. this is related to penley's old theory about relationships with equal power dynamics and the lack of strong female characters in star trek, but not quite the same, because the idea is that the culture we writers have grown up in as well as the cultures of our characters would make it difficult or impossible to write a heterosexual romance that wasn't affected by gender roles and gendered power relations.

Re: the end

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much for all of this. You bring up a lot of what I was thinking, and was thus hoping someone else would corroborate, but you also raise several points I hadn't thought of, which is even more terrific. Thanks for taking the time to write this. Also, thanks for the link to mirabile_dictu's essay--that exactly the kind of thing that I need, and that I ought to know about but don't, 'cause I don't read enough meta. =)