Rite of Passage
Nov. 30th, 2005 06:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
trinityofoneThere comes a time in every young fangirl's life when, should she still reside amongst the chalk-dust lecture halls and book-dust libraries of academia, she must pick up the mantle and write an academic paper about slash. And for me, brothers and sisters (mostly sisters), that time has come.
Basically what happened was this: my popular literature class had a guest lecturer, Prof. McCarthy. She was giving a talk on Poppy Z. Brite's Exquisite Corpse (which, embarrassingly, I still have not been able to find), and in doing so, she talked about serial killers in both history and literature, and provided us with some great quotes. (One of my favorites, Paul Anthony Woods on Norman Bates: "He registers in our hearts as one of the most loveable sickos of pop culture.") Then she showed us selected postings from the Yahoo!Group JeffreyDahmerClub. If you click on the link, which I do NOT recommend, you'll see some of what she showed us: people (mostly women) talking about how much they love Jeffrey Dahmer, how they feel he was just misunderstood, how hot he is--all very serious and earnest. I was, needless to say, disturbed by this. Especially because one of the first thoughts that entered my mind was: "Jesus, these people must've been on Yahoo!Groups talking about their love for a serial killer at the exact same time I, fresh-faced and 17, was there posting about my love for Spike."
...At which point I would like to take a time out and say: Fuck you, David Fury.
But ANYWAY...just then Prof. McCarthy said something about how both serial killers and their fans exhibit an "obsessive and insatiable" need for more, more, more. And then she brought up slash.
Slash readers and writers--the term was of course defined for the giggling audience, with the inevitable Kirk/Spock example and an increase in giggling--exhibit, said McCarthy, the same need for more of their chosen type of media: more story, more sexual tension, more sex. Brite, not a slash fan, has bemoaned the fact that while "real" writers will work hard to "create real, complex, multidimensional characters with lives that need no 'improvement' by the peanut gallery, all some readers really want is for [the characters] to fall into a huge rutting jizz-drenched scrum" (Fan Nine from Outer Space). Prof. McCarthy didn't specifically disagree with Brite; mostly she just drew the obvious connections between sex and violence, making, IMO, rather too big a deal about the possible violent connotations of the word "slash." I really wasn't quite sure what she was trying to say, actually; but more than that, I was disturbed that my mind had made the leap from Jeffrey Dahmer fandom to our fandom first, and without being prompted.
After the lecture, there was a question and answer period. I debated whether I should say anything--I didn't want to "out" myself to a room full of strangers, and I wasn't sure how to neutrally phrase a question, or even what I wanted to ask. Finally, I raised my hand and mumbled something about how, while I definitely saw the connection between obsessive-compulsive, insatiable behaviour and slash fandom, didn't Prof. McCarthy think it might have less to do with violence, and more to do with (here I stumbled, wanting to say--I think--love) romance novels? You know, the type little old ladies check out from the library, the type with Fabio on the cover? Prof. McCarthy conceded that this might be so. Class dismissed.
I left unsatisfied. I thought about just going home and writing a bitchy, dismissive post about how we are NOT like that. Yet I was still bothered by the fact that my brain had made the connection first. And what are we, if not obsessive and insatiable? What does that make us--serial readers? Serial writers? Why do we do what we do?
So I went to Dr. Jones' office hours and outed myself as a slasher.
The meeting began less than promisingly, as he greeted me by saying, "Aren't you the student that asked the question about Fabio?" I admitted that I was, and that yes, I am from Berkeley, and that yes (feeling quite the stereotype), I would like to talk more about the gay porn, please.
Dr. Jones said he was "fascinated by this phenomenon known as 'slash.'" I said I was quite an expert, but that the lecture that morning had made me think about why we did it--why I did it. One of our class' essay titles is "Write an essay on why you think formulaic writing is so popular"--could I, I inquired, write an essay about slash?
His response was enthusiastic. Very enthusiastic. Did I mention that I rather adore him? I do, I do.
Anyway, he introduced me to Prof. Silver, whom he called "the university's resident slash expert." Unfortunately, this is not an actual tenured position--too bad, 'cause nice as Prof. Silver was, I could totally have beaten her out for it. She really didn't know much about internet fandom at all, but she gave me a great book--Constance Penley's NASA/TREK, which I highly recommend, despite the fact that it's old and thus deals mostly with 'zines--and even better, a lot of encouragement. In return, I gave her links to some classic fandom stuff--she'd never heard of the Very Secret Diaries! *gasp*--and, when pressed, some of my own stories. (Yikes!) When I come out, I come out hard--bringing the clothes, the hangers, and the dust bunnies with me.
So now--
The short version: I now have just over a weak to write a paper about Why We Slash. I think I can pull together the more academic, sociological sources, but for the rest, I need your help. I want this paper to be different from other writings about slash and fandom: I'm not going to distance myself; rather, I'm going to get permission to write in the first person and include myself in the analysis. I don't want to be yet another judgmental outsider looking in (or down) on "this phenomenon known as slash"; I'm a part of it, I'm not going to deny it, and that gives me a unique perspective.
But I need other people's perspectives--other people's insights--too. So, fellow fandom folks: if you could take the time to answer the following questions, I would be deeply appreciative.
1. What do you get out of a) fanfiction in general and/or genfic; b) romantic, 'shipper fic, regardless of the genders and sexualities of the participants; and c) slash fic, especially m/m slash?
2. How does what you derive from all of these things differ a) from each other; b) from the source material; and c) from real life?
3. If you're a writer as well as a reader, do you derive a different sort of experience from writing than from reading? How do the two compare? (If you're a vidder or artist, please feel free to talk about that, too.)
4. What were your primary reasons for entering fandom--specifically slash fandom? What are your reasons for staying?
5. Why do you think slash fandom and slash fiction are the phenomena that they are?
If you want to provide info about age, gender, sexual preference, when you entered fandom or how long you've been in it, it would be interesting and useful, but obviously, I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. With that in mind, anyone who'd prefer to take this out of a public forum can also e-mail me at kaufmaa@tcd.ie . You can also comment anonymously, though I'd appreciate it if you could provide me with some sort of alias in case I choose to quote you.
With that in mind: unless you tell me otherwise, any quotes I pull will be attributed to your LJ username (minus the LJ distinction, of course.) So if I were quoting myself, I might say: "'I'm in it for the porn, baby!' said one writer, trinityofone. 'Porn, porn, porn--that's what the internet is for!'"* If you'd prefer to be quoted under a different name, just tell me what it is. But don't get too panicky: this paper will most likely be seen by no one other than Dr. Jones, Prof. McCarthy, Prof. Silver, and myself. And we're all very discreet. ;-)
Finally, PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD. Which is to say: the red light is on, I have multiple varieties of condoms (some are flavored!), but right now I'm all by my lonesome, so I need you to pimp, pimp, pimp. Also, if anyone knows of any communities where I might be able to rustle up some participants, that'd be fab.
So in conclusion: let me know if you have any questions, and thanks in advance!
*Actually, I read slash for the articles. 'The' is a good one; so's 'a.' ...And after that display of dorkery, we're all going to pretend this footnote doesn't exist.
Basically what happened was this: my popular literature class had a guest lecturer, Prof. McCarthy. She was giving a talk on Poppy Z. Brite's Exquisite Corpse (which, embarrassingly, I still have not been able to find), and in doing so, she talked about serial killers in both history and literature, and provided us with some great quotes. (One of my favorites, Paul Anthony Woods on Norman Bates: "He registers in our hearts as one of the most loveable sickos of pop culture.") Then she showed us selected postings from the Yahoo!Group JeffreyDahmerClub. If you click on the link, which I do NOT recommend, you'll see some of what she showed us: people (mostly women) talking about how much they love Jeffrey Dahmer, how they feel he was just misunderstood, how hot he is--all very serious and earnest. I was, needless to say, disturbed by this. Especially because one of the first thoughts that entered my mind was: "Jesus, these people must've been on Yahoo!Groups talking about their love for a serial killer at the exact same time I, fresh-faced and 17, was there posting about my love for Spike."
...At which point I would like to take a time out and say: Fuck you, David Fury.
But ANYWAY...just then Prof. McCarthy said something about how both serial killers and their fans exhibit an "obsessive and insatiable" need for more, more, more. And then she brought up slash.
Slash readers and writers--the term was of course defined for the giggling audience, with the inevitable Kirk/Spock example and an increase in giggling--exhibit, said McCarthy, the same need for more of their chosen type of media: more story, more sexual tension, more sex. Brite, not a slash fan, has bemoaned the fact that while "real" writers will work hard to "create real, complex, multidimensional characters with lives that need no 'improvement' by the peanut gallery, all some readers really want is for [the characters] to fall into a huge rutting jizz-drenched scrum" (Fan Nine from Outer Space). Prof. McCarthy didn't specifically disagree with Brite; mostly she just drew the obvious connections between sex and violence, making, IMO, rather too big a deal about the possible violent connotations of the word "slash." I really wasn't quite sure what she was trying to say, actually; but more than that, I was disturbed that my mind had made the leap from Jeffrey Dahmer fandom to our fandom first, and without being prompted.
After the lecture, there was a question and answer period. I debated whether I should say anything--I didn't want to "out" myself to a room full of strangers, and I wasn't sure how to neutrally phrase a question, or even what I wanted to ask. Finally, I raised my hand and mumbled something about how, while I definitely saw the connection between obsessive-compulsive, insatiable behaviour and slash fandom, didn't Prof. McCarthy think it might have less to do with violence, and more to do with (here I stumbled, wanting to say--I think--love) romance novels? You know, the type little old ladies check out from the library, the type with Fabio on the cover? Prof. McCarthy conceded that this might be so. Class dismissed.
I left unsatisfied. I thought about just going home and writing a bitchy, dismissive post about how we are NOT like that. Yet I was still bothered by the fact that my brain had made the connection first. And what are we, if not obsessive and insatiable? What does that make us--serial readers? Serial writers? Why do we do what we do?
So I went to Dr. Jones' office hours and outed myself as a slasher.
The meeting began less than promisingly, as he greeted me by saying, "Aren't you the student that asked the question about Fabio?" I admitted that I was, and that yes, I am from Berkeley, and that yes (feeling quite the stereotype), I would like to talk more about the gay porn, please.
Dr. Jones said he was "fascinated by this phenomenon known as 'slash.'" I said I was quite an expert, but that the lecture that morning had made me think about why we did it--why I did it. One of our class' essay titles is "Write an essay on why you think formulaic writing is so popular"--could I, I inquired, write an essay about slash?
His response was enthusiastic. Very enthusiastic. Did I mention that I rather adore him? I do, I do.
Anyway, he introduced me to Prof. Silver, whom he called "the university's resident slash expert." Unfortunately, this is not an actual tenured position--too bad, 'cause nice as Prof. Silver was, I could totally have beaten her out for it. She really didn't know much about internet fandom at all, but she gave me a great book--Constance Penley's NASA/TREK, which I highly recommend, despite the fact that it's old and thus deals mostly with 'zines--and even better, a lot of encouragement. In return, I gave her links to some classic fandom stuff--she'd never heard of the Very Secret Diaries! *gasp*--and, when pressed, some of my own stories. (Yikes!) When I come out, I come out hard--bringing the clothes, the hangers, and the dust bunnies with me.
So now--
The short version: I now have just over a weak to write a paper about Why We Slash. I think I can pull together the more academic, sociological sources, but for the rest, I need your help. I want this paper to be different from other writings about slash and fandom: I'm not going to distance myself; rather, I'm going to get permission to write in the first person and include myself in the analysis. I don't want to be yet another judgmental outsider looking in (or down) on "this phenomenon known as slash"; I'm a part of it, I'm not going to deny it, and that gives me a unique perspective.
But I need other people's perspectives--other people's insights--too. So, fellow fandom folks: if you could take the time to answer the following questions, I would be deeply appreciative.
1. What do you get out of a) fanfiction in general and/or genfic; b) romantic, 'shipper fic, regardless of the genders and sexualities of the participants; and c) slash fic, especially m/m slash?
2. How does what you derive from all of these things differ a) from each other; b) from the source material; and c) from real life?
3. If you're a writer as well as a reader, do you derive a different sort of experience from writing than from reading? How do the two compare? (If you're a vidder or artist, please feel free to talk about that, too.)
4. What were your primary reasons for entering fandom--specifically slash fandom? What are your reasons for staying?
5. Why do you think slash fandom and slash fiction are the phenomena that they are?
If you want to provide info about age, gender, sexual preference, when you entered fandom or how long you've been in it, it would be interesting and useful, but obviously, I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. With that in mind, anyone who'd prefer to take this out of a public forum can also e-mail me at kaufmaa@tcd.ie . You can also comment anonymously, though I'd appreciate it if you could provide me with some sort of alias in case I choose to quote you.
With that in mind: unless you tell me otherwise, any quotes I pull will be attributed to your LJ username (minus the LJ distinction, of course.) So if I were quoting myself, I might say: "'I'm in it for the porn, baby!' said one writer, trinityofone. 'Porn, porn, porn--that's what the internet is for!'"* If you'd prefer to be quoted under a different name, just tell me what it is. But don't get too panicky: this paper will most likely be seen by no one other than Dr. Jones, Prof. McCarthy, Prof. Silver, and myself. And we're all very discreet. ;-)
Finally, PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD. Which is to say: the red light is on, I have multiple varieties of condoms (some are flavored!), but right now I'm all by my lonesome, so I need you to pimp, pimp, pimp. Also, if anyone knows of any communities where I might be able to rustle up some participants, that'd be fab.
So in conclusion: let me know if you have any questions, and thanks in advance!
*Actually, I read slash for the articles. 'The' is a good one; so's 'a.' ...And after that display of dorkery, we're all going to pretend this footnote doesn't exist.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2005-12-03 05:42 am (UTC)a) Fanfiction in general: more of characters and world I love, the opportunity to correct canonical choices I dislike, or simply a "road not taken" sense of infinite branching possibilities in the fictional universe, instead of one linear narrative.
b) Shipper fic: relationship dynamics that I am thematically (and emotionally, and sexually) preoccupied with, in this case, messy pasts, estrangement, forgiveness or lack thereof, how to build a new relationship from the ashes of the old, guilt, dark twins/mirrors/unacknowledged kinship between antagonists, and the experience of discovering what, at bottom, is "enough" for each character by making them make hard choices. The latter doesn't *have* to be shipper fic, but I find it usually is.
c) Slash -- not, I think, much that is substantially different from b), but that is an artefact of *which* pairings I choose to ship. They are primarily m/m, because those are the canonical relationships that are most often set up with that kind of simmering anger/subtextual attraction/reluctant sympathy/jockeying for power type dynamic that attracts me, but I get the same charge from the several het and one f/f pairing that I am interested in.
Since I am a het-leaning bi woman, there is the simple math aspect of two hot guys = twice the fun, and it is also fun to both sidestep the gender politics -- especially with things like BDSM, where submissive status and/or physical fighting can become very fraught -- and complicate the relationship because those socially reified roles are not there to step into and characters must discover for themselves, and negotiate with each other, each step of the way.
2. How does what you derive from all of these things differ a) from each other; b) from the source material; and c) from real life?
a) Not much, see above. The primary difference is in what relationship dynamics canon gives me to work with. I don't read much purely gen fic, and when I do, it is *still* primarily relationship focused, it is just that the relationships are not sexualized.
b) the source material tends to prolong these dynamics almost indefinitely without resolving them, and especially without acknowledging the sexual aspect beyond joking, particularly in the case of m/m slash. Partly this is real world politics -- it was pushing the envelope for Joss to put a pair of lesbians on a hit show. For him to make his title hero bi in a show that was already on the bubble would have torn the envelope to shreds, so we only get nods and winks and DVD commentary. But part of it, I think, is the Moonlighting effect -- resolution ends the dramatic tension that keeps people tuning in. They want the wanting, often, more than the having. Fanfiction, on the other hand, is a bunch of tiny self-contained worlds like so many soap bubbles -- we can resolve each relationship a thousand times and still have the baseline yearning of canon to come back to.
c) Real life is a lot less neat, and much more risk averse, and healing after trauma takes long, boring years in therapy, instead of acting out our feelings in a cathartic bout of show-don't-tell. It would be impractical for me to cram this much high drama into my own life, and voyeuristic in an ugly way for me to take pleasure in it in other people's -- not to mention that most of the best bits would be private and inaccessible to my gaze. Fiction, fan and otherwise, is where I get the emo fix which my even-keeled life does not provide -- and which, when my life does provide, I try to damp in the name of civiilized behavior and no psychodrama.
TBC
continued from previous comment
Date: 2005-12-03 05:43 am (UTC)Definitely different. I'll write a much wider range of characters, pairings, and plots than I seek out to read, especially by request. It's more about the challenge -- catching the authentic recognizeable voice, first, and coaxing it into a new story without breaking the continuity of suspension of disbelief, second. The more unlikely the plot versus canon, the more spot-on flavor is needed to preserve that sense of buy-in. It's also a chance to privilege those canonical themes which resonated most with me, and -- without discarding them -- put a gloss on those I found troubling which renders them more sensical or acceptable to me. The writerly high is to evoke a strong reaction in a reader, the readerly high, to have the specific reaction I want to experience evoked.
4. What were your primary reasons for entering fandom--specifically slash fandom? What are your reasons for staying?
My original (het) fannish pairing was first abundantly supplied and then taken in a troubling direction by canon, making my fic and many others' first unneccessary and then both less attractive and more difficult. A real life friend who was a slasher in another pairing (and, previously, in another fandom) had introduced me to LJ, where I met through her and others an assortment of people who were thoughtful readers and good writers in a variety of pairings, including slash. I found one that moved me just as strongly as my het pairing, if not more so, with less canonical complication, and that has been my primary affinity ever since, though others have waxed and waned. I stick around because nothing else I've found is as pure a distillation of the dynamics that interest me as those two, and I'm not tired of it yet.
5. Why do you think slash fandom and slash fiction are the phenomena that they are?
I think the continuing work of feminism and birth control have made female sexual autonomy ever more thinkable; the Internet, with its quasi-anonymity and reduction of geographic factors, had made sexual content of all kinds more accessible; the text-based nature of fanfic has made it a more attractive vehicle for female sexual fantasies than, say, photographs (not that there aren't female fan artists, or male fanfic slashers, or that slash didn't exist before the internet, but the vast majority of slash fandom these days is an online, predominantly female, predominantly text-based community.) Also, the idea of looking for hidden romance within more "masculine" -- action adventure and science-based genres -- is an easier jump for girls used to identifying with male protagonists than with men who were, most of them, still raised to avoid the stigma of girl books and girl toys.
There is also a sense in which fanfic is porn without the troubling ethical questions -- a way that women can experience the fun of being a sexual subject with sexual objects without either distancing ourselves from another set of women and becoming "honorary guys" or subjecting guys to a stance they may find threatening or that we may ourselves have not enjoyed.
Or at least, with a different set of ethical issues. There is copyright and RPS and chan and rape fantasy to argue about, but we are at least spared the issue of human trafficking and underage actors and drugs and the possibility of unfree consent and exploitation.
Re: continued from previous comment
Date: 2005-12-04 12:48 pm (UTC)Fanfiction, on the other hand, is a bunch of tiny self-contained worlds like so many soap bubbles -- we can resolve each relationship a thousand times and still have the baseline yearning of canon to come back to.
That set off a whole bunch of eager bobble-headed nodding on my part. *g*
My original (het) fannish pairing was first abundantly supplied and then taken in a troubling direction by canon, making my fic and many others' first unneccessary and then both less attractive and more difficult.
Spuffy, by chance? ;-)