SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

[sweetvalleyslut.livejournal.com]

Michael pinned an unresisting Teyla onto the red silken coverlet of the enormous four-poster bed, and as she gazed in shock at his face, whitened slightly as if he had been hours dead, and into his eyes, the color of raw halibut, she knew that this was the one man who could make her truly submit to his overpowering will and make her truly a thing of his own possession: and she loved him for it.

[ceitie.livejournal.com]

I think it's the raw halibut eyes that really makes it work. *cringes and giggles at the same time*

[sweetvalleyslut.livejournal.com]

Halibut: the funniest of all fishes.