SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

[furina-1975.livejournal.com]

OK. Ya'll are making me laugh so I'm gonna give this a try.

Sentence the first: After all the strange things that had happened to Rodney durring his stay in the Pegasus galaxy waking up with horns and a tail didn't even rate on his weird-o-meter.

Sentence the second: Rodney McKay, Cheif Scientist, regards his reflection in the aincent mirror, "Rod, you are a sexy bitch," he says to himself as she smooths one hand down his chest, "I think it is time to go to the lab and make somebody cry like a little girl."

[neery.livejournal.com]

I would actually read the first story without a second thought if it wasn't for the typos and grammatical errors. This fandom has corrupted me.

The second one, on the other hand, burns.

[furina-1975.livejournal.com]

Why, thank you.