SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

this is such a great idea.

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

we could do it dan brown style: (http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000844.html)

Renowned scientist and chief science officer Rodney McKay staggered into John Sheppard's bedroom, out of breath and red-faced, so John knew that the time had come for their relationship to go deeper.

or simply:

John will never forget the day that he became aware of his prostate.

Re: this is such a great idea.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Dan Brown style! Hee. That rocks. Also, thank you for linking to that article—I read it a while back and I've been trying to find it again for ages.