SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

[zellieh]

I love all these entries. They are just so, so funny. Here are my two twisted contributions:

1) As Beckett finished examining McKay, he looked, up at Shepperd, with horrified eyes, exclaiming, "It's worse than we thought, Colonel - They've stolen his brain!"

2) Overcome with despair and sobbing quietly John wiped away the tears as he snuck out onto the balcony, reaching into the pocket of his BUD's and pulling out a razor blade as he rolled back his sleeve...

[zellieh]

Yep. When I re-watched that episode as an adult, I just laughed and laughed and laughed - 'Spock's Brain' is certainly classic *something*. *g*