trinityofone

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

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From:

hyperfocused.livejournal.com

"Oh, yes! Joh --- ahhhhh ahhhhhhhhhh ahhhhhhhhhhh ahhhhhhhhh aaaaahhh ahhhh aaaaahhhh ahhhhh ahhhhhhhh ahhhhh aaaaaahhhh ahhhhhh ahhhhh ahhhhhhh ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh ahhhhhhhhhhhh SPLAT" went Rodney, as John fucked him over the balcony, his monster orgrasm changing from ultimate pleasure to ultimate horror as the ten thousand year old structure collapsed, sending them both hurtling into the blue-green ocean, to be subsumed by the waves, much like the Atlantis they'd once thought legendary -- legendary like the love he and John shared, but all too real.