SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

[siria]

"Oh, John" Teyla said, eyes wide, hands clasped, "tell me more of this wonderful Republican Party to which you have long pledged your allegiance, and also of your glorious leader Bush."

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

*is reduced to hysterical sobbing*

[siria]

John joined the party after some gentle encouragement from his cousin Julian, you know.

[trinityofone.livejournal.com]

Tell me he is working to thwart them from the inside!

[siria]

He will defeat them with the power of cock! For his plan is cunning.