SGA Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

cincodemaygirl pointed out that the winners of this year's Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced. This is the contest where people try to create the worst opening sentence of a novel EVER. Glancing over the winners, I remembered that ages back someone had done a BtVS version of the contest. (My favorite entry was, and still is, "I'm back!" Riley said.) And I thought: Dude, we need to have the SGA version of this, like, yesterday.

So! Comment here with the worst possible sentence you can imagine opening an SGA fic. On Friday morning, I'll pick a winner and maybe a few runners-up and there will be prizes of some kind. (Maybe fic, maybe something else.) Hopefully, if enough people play, this will be entertaining enough to get us through to the premiere.

I may also compose a few bad sentences myself, although obviously, I am not qualified to win my own contest. *g* Oh, and please feel free to pimp this!

Okay...go!

ETA: In response to a question: Yes, you can enter as many times as you want. *eg*

Comments

[furina-1975.livejournal.com]

OK. One more. John fingered his black wrist band; he knew that there were many, many theories about why he wore the wrist band; but none would ever guess the real reason, he wore the band to cover his shame--his tatoo, the ill gotten gain of that one night years ago, the night that he doesn't remember, the night that made him swear off tequila forever, the tatoo that simply said: Cock 4ever.

[porntestpilot.livejournal.com]

I will read that story and frame it on my wall.

[furina-1975.livejournal.com]

hmmm, maybe I'll write it. Could be fun.