Fannish Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

Smart Bitches Trashy Books is having a contest in honor of the 2008 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winners. Two years ago, I held a similar contest. I feel like it's time to bring it back—with a vengeance!

Here are the rules:

1. Comment with the worst sentence you can imagine opening a fic. I am opening this up to any and all fandoms this year, with the caveat that, as the initial judge, I may be more partial to fandoms I am familiar with. Note: the sentence should be a sentence. Crazy punctuation is fine and even encouraged, but opening paragraphs will not be counted. ETA: You're welcome to make as many entries as you like. I'd recommend one per comment for clarity, but I'm not gonna be a stickler on that.

2. On Thursday morning-ish, I will choose my ten favorite entries for everyone to vote on. Feel free to comment on your favorite entries; my opinions on matters unpolitical can often be swayed. ;-)

3. Voting will run through the weekend; on Monday I will announce the winners and possibly some runners-up. There will be prizes! (Most likely a selection of used books on numerous enchanting subjects.)

4. Feel free to link! Let's see if we can make this an omnifannish extravaganza.

And...go!

Comments

[sheafrotherdon.livejournal.com]

Her blood sugar dropping, Jennifer had no choice but to drop her pants, root around, and dislodge the rotini from her vagina.

[toft-froggy.livejournal.com]

Oh oh oh, WHAT? *crosses legs*

[smangosbubbles]

OH GOD WHY.

Pasta, it does not belong in vaginas.

[sholio]

OH GOD.

[caersmane.livejournal.com]

Well, I think you win. That was not only the worst opening line, but probably the worst line ever thought of. Thanks. I was going to make pasta tonite too. Think I will make something else now.

[perspi.livejournal.com]

OH HELL NO!

*cringes*
*runs away*