Fannish Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

Smart Bitches Trashy Books is having a contest in honor of the 2008 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winners. Two years ago, I held a similar contest. I feel like it's time to bring it back—with a vengeance!

Here are the rules:

1. Comment with the worst sentence you can imagine opening a fic. I am opening this up to any and all fandoms this year, with the caveat that, as the initial judge, I may be more partial to fandoms I am familiar with. Note: the sentence should be a sentence. Crazy punctuation is fine and even encouraged, but opening paragraphs will not be counted. ETA: You're welcome to make as many entries as you like. I'd recommend one per comment for clarity, but I'm not gonna be a stickler on that.

2. On Thursday morning-ish, I will choose my ten favorite entries for everyone to vote on. Feel free to comment on your favorite entries; my opinions on matters unpolitical can often be swayed. ;-)

3. Voting will run through the weekend; on Monday I will announce the winners and possibly some runners-up. There will be prizes! (Most likely a selection of used books on numerous enchanting subjects.)

4. Feel free to link! Let's see if we can make this an omnifannish extravaganza.

And...go!

Comments

Harry Potter

[incandescens]

Harry could taste his drool as it ran from his mouth, and he leaned forward in the chains, watching helplessly as his lover Draco Malfoy won his thirteenth Olympic gold, shackled to the wall in this grimy dungeon underneath the bottom of the Hogwarts Potions Classroom as Voldemort (Polyjuiced into Harry's lean muscular body) ravaged a kiss from the dripping Draco's lips as he hauled his half-naked torso, clad only in black and green speedos, out of the Beijing pool to the applause of the crowd.