Fannish Bulwer-Lytton Contest!

[trinityofone]

Smart Bitches Trashy Books is having a contest in honor of the 2008 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winners. Two years ago, I held a similar contest. I feel like it's time to bring it back—with a vengeance!

Here are the rules:

1. Comment with the worst sentence you can imagine opening a fic. I am opening this up to any and all fandoms this year, with the caveat that, as the initial judge, I may be more partial to fandoms I am familiar with. Note: the sentence should be a sentence. Crazy punctuation is fine and even encouraged, but opening paragraphs will not be counted. ETA: You're welcome to make as many entries as you like. I'd recommend one per comment for clarity, but I'm not gonna be a stickler on that.

2. On Thursday morning-ish, I will choose my ten favorite entries for everyone to vote on. Feel free to comment on your favorite entries; my opinions on matters unpolitical can often be swayed. ;-)

3. Voting will run through the weekend; on Monday I will announce the winners and possibly some runners-up. There will be prizes! (Most likely a selection of used books on numerous enchanting subjects.)

4. Feel free to link! Let's see if we can make this an omnifannish extravaganza.

And...go!

Comments

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[entropy-house.livejournal.com]

No, but not on moral grounds. I'm not current on any of the sources, and two of them are unknown to me.

People who know me will attest that I'll stoop to any depths.I took The Nightmare Pairing Pledge. (http://entropy-house.livejournal.com/23113.html)

And wrote it here (http://entropy-house.livejournal.com/24350.html) (I think it's quite as evil as anything here.) (In fact, it's disgusting and perverted, if you don't like that sort of thing, I wouldn't recommend you look. It's also very short, though, which is its main advantage.)

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[busaikko]

Hee. The ending of that fic rocks (though the last time I saw B7 I was in high school, *very small letters* 20 years ago... you're perverting my childhood!)

I just bought first editions of the TPs for the Valdemar series: fear me! And Pern I memorised long ago. If you are in fandom, especially con-going fandom, do read Bimbos of the Death Sun (it's a murder mystery by Sharon McCrumb set at an SFF con, and even though it's dated -- the book must be 20 years old -- it's spot-on, in a friendly and funny way, about the kinds of people who go to cons). I'm pretty sure SGA fandom, full of crack as it is, *already has* crossovers with Valdemar and Pern and Discworld. I'm sure of it....

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[entropy-house.livejournal.com]

Hah! I didn't know you knew B7. That's been my only participating fandom for more than 20 years.

I had most of the Valdemar & Pern ones up until I stopped buying paperbacks (when I went to the bookstore and all the ones I wanted were $10 each I stopped collecting.) I've just added Bimbos to my Amazon shopping list for the next time I buy from them. :^)

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[busaikko]

Yay! Hope you enjoy it. I don't recall much of B7 *mind like a sieve* except for, you know, the inevitable Blake/Avon shipping. And the Send in the Clowns video (the firstest ever fanvid I ever saw ♥)

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[entropy-house.livejournal.com]

Is there anything to B7 beyond the B/A? Avon's leather & studs, Blake's curls and knuckle-sucking. Mmmm...

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[busaikko]

* wanders around your website, admiring the cross-stitch patterns and generating porn *

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[entropy-house.livejournal.com]

The porn generator is a wonderful time-waster; enjoy! :^)

Re: SGA / Heralds of Valdemar / Dragonriders of Pern / Doctor Who / Bimbos of the Death Sun / Discwo

[jrprongs.livejournal.com]

Pern and Discworld, yes we do! I'm not sure if there's any Valdemar/SGA fic but I might've just not found it yet.